it's been a really long time since i have posted on here. a damn long time. but..........i've been so bored lately, what the hell. im not even too sure where to begin, or where i left off. but here goes.
~ ive pretty much given up on building the house here in citrus. everything is so confusing with this issue. and disheartening. ive wanted this so badly, for so long. i actually first applied for the program last november. we got shut down in july. there was no money left. we waiting that long to hear "no". that we would have to wait for the beginning of the fiscal year which, is october. the state/county whatever then has up to 90 days to review, before they give out the loans. so that looks like maybe january we would know something. but then, with all the taxes going up and impact fees...please. $23,000 for a house the size that we would be building, in impact fees alone. that makes it even more so impossible to live here. well for low income anyways. and lets face it, we're low income. i mean, i would love for us to go buy even just a 150,000 dollar house. which, for a house here for that amount, really isnt shit. but realistically, for us both to get new vehicles, and live comfortably, we can't afford those payments, with the taxes and insurance. maybe just the payments, we could do it. i just feel like its never enough. so im looking at the possibility of us moving, finally. chris and i have both been going over this in ours heads. its kinda scary for me to think about moving, so scary. ive never really left home. even when i moved to tampa, i didnt really leave. and even so then, there was family down there to keep me grounded. but its not even just me and chris. katie. how do i take her away from family. and the ONLY way i would move out of florida is if i could stay home with her. at least for maybe two-three years. enough for us to know the area, and where i could put her. and housing is really cheap in georgia and tennessee. but is there work there? so this is really making my heart heavy. because, really, i have been putting off my whole life to make the house happen. chris and i have not got married. which lets face it, im dying to do that. i have not purchased a new car, so that my debt to income ratio is strong. seeing as how, well i have zero debt. no more babies till we get a house. i cant quit this boring job until we get the house built. so well......i just, well, ive given that up. time to think of more options. isnt it funny, the one thing i really want, really, a home for my family, and i work in a damn real estate office for petes sake, and nada. haha. how ironic.
but ive looked at some of my old journals lately, even from the starsb2003 name. and wow. have i changed.
i want to be the happy chipper person i once was.
on a lighter note, im so darn happy with katie. shes the reason why i get up every morning. shes the love of my life. wait till you have kids, if you do. you'll see. there is nothing else like it in the world.
chris and i are doing good. hes so wonderful. especially for me. i cant wait to marry him. and be one under god.
but i think this is long enough for now.
i hope everyone is doing well.
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this is a great one of her hand and fingers! you can see her other hand up above her left, and she is blocking her face!
this is my fave....you can see the profile of her little face. you can see the detail of her ear. I can't wait to kiss her!
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